[Refined Mind]

I have a constant sense that someone is laughing at me or scrutinizing my every move making fun of me. I dont know what the fuck it is, but I know that it drives me crazy. I always feel like people are demeaning me and saying shit behind my back and that I am on the outside or the receiving end of an inside joke. What the fuck? DOES ANYONE ELSE FEEL LIKE THIS? Work is a good example of this. I have been getting really agitated lately and all this is making me want to snap on my "enemies." Some of my closer constituents tell me that im crazy, but I can swear that it's true!!!! I do my job well, I know that much. I don't know, maybe im not meant to be a socialite. The only time I ever am decent at that is when I'm fucked up.

[GummyBearOfDoom]

Yea, sometimes I feel self conscious and shit. It sucks.

Dude go take a yoga class or something, haha. Sounds like you need to relax, idk light some candles and listen to songs of the whale.

Wear a bathrobe and freeball.

[Refined Mind]

GummyBearOfDoom, on May 19 2009, 01:19 AM, said:

Yea, sometimes I feel self conscious and shit. It sucks.

Dude go take a yoga class or something, haha. Sounds like you need to relax, idk light some candles and listen to songs of the whale.

Wear a bathrobe and freeball.

LoL. Dude, none of that shit will help, I'll think the whale is moaning and groaning calling me a bitch and that the bathrobe is calling my nutz small.

No just playing about all that. But I hope that this is something that goes away. I hate this insecurity bullshit.

[Evergreen_forest]

I know exactly what you mean dude. Get that sort of shit a lot.

The thing is I have no idea how to sort it out... I just get more and more angry.

[Svenska Aeroplan]

Yes. Humans scrutinize each other. They do it to you, just as you do it to them. Fuck 'em.

[Refined Mind]

Svenska Aeroplan, on May 19 2009, 07:04 AM, said:

Yes. Humans scrutinize each other. They do it to you, just as you do it to them. Fuck 'em.

True. Thanks. I'm not so much feeling like that anymore. I don't know why it was consuming me for a minute. I know that all that matters is that I am content with myself. My motto is Illigitimae Noncarborunum-"don't let the bastards wear you down."

[JeremyGEE]

I felt like this A LOT. Eventually I just let go. I stopped caring who was watching or what they said or thought.

And when anger builds, I go work a few rounds on the heavy bag. Honestly, just beating that leather makes me feel like I am transferring all the negative energy out of me.

[GummyBearOfDoom]

At school and shit I always felt like when people were laughing it was at me.

I don't think it's all too uncommon.

Or maye we are all fucked up.

[Refined Mind]

GummyBearOfDoom, on May 20 2009, 02:05 PM, said:

At school and shit I always felt like when people were laughing it was at me.

I don't think it's all too uncommon.

Or maye we are all fucked up.

Right dude. I was there with you. I still think they were laughing at us homie. But shit. Fuck them and everyone else. The only way that it bothers me is that it provokes anger and sometimes I want to unleash that shit on some motherfuckers. But yeah, I don't know. I have calmed down and I think that I am getting into my element. The only thing that I'm worried about right now is getting shit done and enjoying my life.

[Belial]

Take less drugs.

[Refined Mind]

Belial, on May 21 2009, 03:38 PM, said:

Take less drugs.

As of now I am not doing any drugs .

[U-1]

I'm paranoid everyday

[Refined Mind]

U-1, on May 22 2009, 03:44 AM, said:

I'm paranoid everyday

which reminds me of a good song i cant think of the name of, would be good them music for this topic. "Paranoia, paranoia, everybody's coming to get me, told em all i was crazy, cut off my legs now im an amputee god damn you.... IM NOT SICK BUT IM NOT WELL>" My favorite verse in that song is "I took a trip around the world to see that only stupid people are breeding..." Damn I suck at song names and who sings them... Who sings that? And what is the name of it???

[GummyBearOfDoom]

Harvey Danger - Flagpole
http://www.youtube.c...h?v=nBgmC_USeoM
Is that it?

[Refined Mind]

GummyBearOfDoom, on May 22 2009, 03:56 AM, said:

Harvey Danger - Flagpole
http://www.youtube.c...h?v=nBgmC_USeoM
Is that it?

Hell yeah dude... that is getting added tonight. been a long ass time since ive heard this song.

[DreamerGirl]

Belial, on May 21 2009, 02:38 PM, said:

Take less drugs.

As (probably) one of the top drug users on here I can say as much as I don't want to back up this statement, it's true. Even if you only use them occasionally the messing with the chemicals carries on way past that.

What I do that works best for me is some basic cognitive therapy. Do some reading up on what you do and how it effects you, so that you can better understand that it's your mind trying to manipulate you into thinking people are laughing/talking/staring. When you start thinking that way, change that voice into talking yourself into it's nothing.

The other day I ended a binge of e, shrooms, coke, and more at a rave after party where there were 3 different languages going on in the room and I only spoke one of them. If I survived that without wigging out anything is possible.

Either way, paranoia is a normal symptom of an anxiety disorder which you already admitted is quite possible you have since you show signs of social anxiety. A lot of sober people have anxiety disorders and crazy just means abnormal anyways.

[Wind]

Refined Mind, on May 19 2009, 12:14 AM, said:

I have a constant sense that someone is laughing at me or scrutinizing my every move making fun of me. I dont know what the fuck it is, but I know that it drives me crazy. I always feel like people are demeaning me and saying shit behind my back and that I am on the outside or the receiving end of an inside joke. What the fuck? DOES ANYONE ELSE FEEL LIKE THIS? Work is a good example of this. I have been getting really agitated lately and all this is making me want to snap on my "enemies." Some of my closer constituents tell me that im crazy, but I can swear that it's true!!!! I do my job well, I know that much. I don't know, maybe im not meant to be a socialite. The only time I ever am decent at that is when I'm fucked up.

I am willing to bet its a mild case of Schizophrenia which the symptoms are easily managed with proper medication.

My girlfriend has mild Schizophrenia, hears demeaning words about her character or apperance, gets really paranoid in crowded settings or if not in a good mindset generally but this is when she is not medicated.

[Artie]

Wind, on Jun 24 2009, 08:04 PM, said:

I am willing to bet its a mild case of Schizophrenia which the symptoms are easily managed with proper medication.

My girlfriend has mild Schizophrenia, hears demeaning words about her character or apperance, gets really paranoid in crowded settings or if not in a good mindset generally but this is when she is not medicated.

He said that he fears people are talking about him, not that he actually hears them, so that pretty much rules out schizophrenia.

What you're experiencing seems more like an anxiety disorder rather than anything like schizophrenia. The same thing happens to me a lot as well.

[Scarface]

Sounds like a case of the Mondays.

[Wind]

Artie, on 25 June 2009 - 02:17 PM, said:

He said that he fears people are talking about him, not that he actually hears them, so that pretty much rules out schizophrenia.

What you're experiencing seems more like an anxiety disorder rather than anything like schizophrenia. The same thing happens to me a lot as well.

I had severe anxiety and panic dis-order and if he's complaining about it this much without going to a doctor then what the hell is he doing?, stop being a sissy, go get some damn xanax and pop them you'll be fine until you become brutally addicted to them.

and what he is saying is worded in a way that only someone with physcosis would write, its almost written as if he was being precauscious that his "Enemies" are going to read.