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Where I've been the last week.


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I don't know if anyone has noticed a lack of activity from me over the past week, but I haven't posted more then twice in the last seven days and I just figured I'd let you guys in on why. Let me start at the start and work forward from there. For the last six months I've been living with a guy I've known for a while and his girlfriend in a house we rent. After deciding not to go back to school for the spring semester I knew I couldn't live with my parents, so I moved out an got a shitty job at a regional SuperCenter that just manages to pay the bills. Things have been slow the last five months, but I'm not starving so I guess I'm alright. About a month ago school let out for all my friends, and one of them decided to move in with the three of us for the summer. We got him hooked up with a job washing dishes at a restaurant nearby and I loaned him $100 to buy a uniform, pay for groceries and to pay for the gas I spent driving him to and from work. The two of us hung out every moment we weren't working and I grew closer to my friend then I'd been in years (I've known since second grade, some 13 years). Then about a week ago, my buddy's girlfriend of five years, who had been attending a study-abroad program in London, calls him at 3a.m. to tell him she's met someone else and they're through. He was devastated and I spend the next couple days doing everything I can to comfort the guy. We decide that we're going to throw a huge party the coming up Saturday (last Saturday) in order to celebrate his new found independence, and he invites as many girls from work in the hopes of being able to, as we put it, "get back up on the horse". Saturday comes, the party starts and everything is going awesome. Around midnight, my ex-girlfriend, whom I had been thinking a lot about these last few months but had just recently worked up the nerve to actually call her and started talking to again, shows up. We had dated twice over the course of about seven months, and though we had fooled around often, we had never “gone all the way”. The last time we had fooled around though, she told me she wanted to, but I was unwilling to since I respected her enough that I wasn't going to just fuck her and leave. In the months that have followed that experience I had come to realize that I loved her, not in a sexual way, more of in a brother-sister capacity. The love is unconditional and unrequited , but I'm O.K. with that. Anyway, I talk to her for a couple hours at the party, and then decide to go to bed, since I have to work in the morning. The next morning I check my voicemail and find one from another friend who was at the party. His drunken voice is filled with laughter and joy as he tells me my ex-girlfriend is fucking my friend who lives with me. The voicemail is timestamped at around 6 am, its a little after 7. Silently I make my way downstairs to my buddy's room and when my eyes adjust to the darkness I almost doubled over. Cloths were scattered everywhere and they where embracing each other, clearly in a state of afterglow; it had been her first time. I won't bother describing my thoughts over the next three days, but I will tell you that I was drunk all three nights. Finally on the third night I had enough liquid courage in me to call her. We talked about it for about a half hour and I explained to her that I had only hoped that her first time be with someone who loved her and made her feel special, not some drunken asshole who could care less. She explained to me that, while she herself hadn't been drunk, she had just felt so sorry for him, what with his longtime girlfriend dumping him on such short notice, that she couldn't help herself, and felt that someone needed to comfort him.

That was two days ago now and I guess I'm doing alright. I finally talked to my friend after four days of silence, and while he isn't sorry for fucking her, he is sorry for how I felt about the whole thing. Thats not really good enough for me, but I guess I'll just have to deal with it.

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Belial, you are a pretty rockin' dude. I'm not sure I would have handled that so smoothly at all. And I'm aware that it doesn't sound like you handled it very smoothly.

However... I'm not certain how you should've handled it. It sounds like you're talking to both people again, which is good... Considering you live with one of them.

I don't know. I guess my advice in this situation is to not take it too hard. Having sex for the first time, I don't know, it's pretty abstract to place importance on it. At the same time, it seems rather odd for your roommate to have sex with that specific girl, seeing as he was probably aware you too had a history together.

But. It still sucks. On the bright side (if there is one, in this situation) at least your friend's not lying to you and saying he's sorry when he isn't.

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I'm pretty sure you're handling it better than I would, and that's a good thing (I have a bit of a temper problem). Just remember, most of us are total losers who will be here when you need us. So take care of whatever you have to, it sounds like this is a stressful situation. Unless Wind fucks up majorly AE will be here when you get back.

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It's these types of situations that I just feel like you will never, ever understand someone your entire life. If I were in your shoes, I would most likely be packing my belongings and finding a new place to live because I feel like ex-girlfriends are off-limits to close friends no what the situation may be.

No matter how stong of a person you may be, having to watch someone that you have had feelings for go off and give something you felt like you were going to have is nothing short of devastating. Not only that, but she has to live with the fact that she was nothing more than a rebound fuck, no matter what she wants to think, you can even show her my post, hell, call me and I'll tell her on the phone.

You handled this pretty well, I respect that, but you need to re-evaluate your relationship with your friend, because if he would do something like that to you, who knows what the next step is?

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You handled this pretty well, I respect that, but you need to re-evaluate your relationship with your friend, because if he would do something like that to you, who knows what the next step is?

Geh, I'm not sure I'd do something so extreme. It was a very dumb thing to do, but then perhaps I'm forgiving to a fault.

I've only ever intentionally alienated one person because of shit they did to me.

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