arborphilia

[margot]

i'd hit it.

[margot]

NSFW

[margot]

A POEM by lj user ricochet_rabbit

"I wish I could forget the way

Your bark feels against my skin

I wish I could remember the life I had

Before you had me in your branches

.

The life was simple and lively before

I shed my first tears for you.

Why do you like torturing me with your leaves?

Best friends, you say? I call it bull s**t.

You use me, and I don't mind.

It's the only way I can get to you.

So close, I can feel sap breath on my neck.

I don't want it to end, and yet it kills me

To know you have no feelings involved.

Unlike me.

I'm in love with a dream, nonexistant, painful.

You're amazing, skillful, cruel.

Might as well just shoot me, while I'm still alive.

It wont be for much longer,

I can already feel the life slipping away, so slowly.

Just one more kiss, one more breath,

Please, darling, say you love me.

I don't care if it's just another lie,

I need it to get me high one last time."

[margot]

tree love story

My love for trees was kept secret from my friends. And most importantly, kept secret from my fern tree, Barbie, and my pine tree, Gargenti. However, these feelings of unbridled lust couldn't be secretive anymore. I was catching myself constantly making excuses for venturing into my backyard.

"But why do you want to go into the backyard, Julie? We have a GARDENER!" My rich, pompous EX husband, Sir Felix Stones, would always say through his monocle, as he read some BOOK. (I am against books. Trees are killed so carelessly just so you can have something to read on the train. It's HORRIBLE)

Eventually, I grew more comfortable apporaching the trees. However, I made sure to rendezvous with the trees late at night, so my husband wouldn't catch me in the act.

Gargenti, Barbie and I grew very fond of each other. Barbie was especially fond of my blonde jokes. I once made a blonde joke that caused Barbie to shake her leaves so furiously in laughter, that it caused her to crack in half and collapse on my house. Or that might have been because of the lightning that struck her. That was a day of mourning for Gargenti and I, but we recovered with the help of each other. I read Gargenti the book "Tuesdays With Morrie" and we grew closer and closer. One day, lust overcame. I found myself deeply embraced with Gargenti's lower tree trunk. Passion, oh the passion. His bark oozed with sap; Pine cones fluttered to the ground. His branches swayed rhythmically in the air, as if to say, "Yes, yes! This is so GOOD!"

My husband caught us.

Tree weeks later, my husband moved to Barbados. I haven't heard from him since, but this gave me ample time to explore my arbor-love with Gargenti.

[margot]

crube moved my thread to general???

[Crube]

crube moved my thread to general???

It seems appropriate. Atleast I didn't delete it.

[Samurai Drifter]

Why is this not in porn/hentai?!

This one might please Crube and Vampy:

[margot]

oo a threesome you say

[Arcane]

Hawt.

[Crube]

Why is this not in porn/hentai?!

This one might please Crube and Vampy:

What?

[margot]

tree yaoi

[Natsu]

Hawt.

now thats a Long one

[Samurai Drifter]

I think that's Treebeard right there.

[Poophy]

Just for the record, you guys scare me sometimes…

[margot]

so how many of you guys have treefriends?

Last night I met a wonderful pine named Cathy. <3

[amy]

I don't "know" any trees "personally" but there is this one tree in the back of my school that everyone sits under and in the spring, it is beautiful, because the buds all flower in one color. But then when they open, they are a different color, and it's even more beautiful. And then the petals fall off, and the tree is a different kind of tree, a summer-style tree. And then the leaves fall off and are replaced by heavy red berries and a feeling of autumn, and then the berries fall off and it becomes a winter tree. I really like this tree, and so does everyone else I know, the way three year olds love a babysitter that has a lot of boyfriends and likes to sing.

[Samurai Drifter]

Orgy!

[margot]

woahh SD, you might want to put a warning up first. i must admit i was a little shocked to see that so early in the morning.

[Crube]

Good God, SD! I think I even see a sapling in that picture!

[Ceraziefish]

oo a threesome you say

I believe you mean a treesome?

[margot]

I believe you mean a treesome?

no because I am not a tree..though I do like to watch treesomes. I love to watch.

anyway do you guys wear condoms when you mate with your treefriend(s)? I don't have to worry about it obviously, but you men better be careful, you don't want saplings so young in life.

[darkon]

I got splinters last time.

I think I'm going to retire from tree sex.

[Ceraziefish]

no because I am not a tree..though I do like to watch treesomes. I love to watch.

anyway do you guys wear condoms when you mate with your treefriend(s)? I don't have to worry about it obviously, but you men better be careful, you don't want saplings so young in life.

I have no problem with spreading my seed about. After all, it's easier to move away from your problems when they can't follow you, like human children.

[margot]

that's true...no sapplings will come knocking on your door 20 years later..

[darkon]

that's true...no sapplings will come knocking on your door 20 years later..

However significant scientific research shows their roots will.