Prose Offering for May 28th

[Gundampilotspaz]

Well, I did conceive of a short story for this. It was a cool idea involving a new system that the government comes up with to control unlicensed drivers from driving and prevent thrift by using Multifactor Authentication.....but that never even got started.

I have been working on a concept piece which I started about a year ago, I wrote two different pieces about 1000 words each and then put them away. I recently picked one back up and have added another 2500 words to it. It is still very much a conceptual piece, I'm attempting to play with the characters and the universe and I am writing the notes for the story has I'm working on the prose.

The story has to do with the idea that a Universe (probably not ours, but an alternate one) has been invaded and conquered by a alternate set of humans who have gain the power to manipulate the "Void"; the space that separates parallel Universes. Shortly after they first invade the humans in the Universe they are invading have this ability awoke and begin to fight back. But it's too late and they fail and those who have unlocked this power are forced to go into the underground.

What this treatment is, is an afterwards. They were able to force the invaders from the Earth and they are now trapped in the Void between the two universes.

_____________________________________________________________________

The light scares away that which he fear, the unknown mystery of the darkness. The Darkness consumes all that it touches, spreads fear among humans, Where the sun doesn't touch, where the sun fears to go.

The night covered the small town, the moon and stars hidden behind a vail of gray clouds of an oncoming storm. Whispers in the darkness, falling deaf on human ears. Those creatures of the sun do not know this world.

A glimpse of a shadow, a rustle of the leaves, slight movement on the wind were the only proof of the world beyond the sun.

A single car traveled along down the center street the headlights broke the darkness, only a few houses had lights on, they shined dimly upon the world at that hour, a great peace had settled on the earth as the sun retires for it's nightly rest. Humans who have settled into their safe homes where they can be protected from the darkness, inside their own private worlds.

The car was moving slowly. The whispers grew from the darkness. A shadow appeared on the side of the road to watch as the car passed him, then disappeared just as quickly. The car past, the shadow went unnoticed. Again it blinked into existence, the ghastly image of a human, strong build dressed in a long flowing cloak that hid most of his features. The cloak was unsure wither it was of the physical world of a creation of the night, and while looking at it you couldn't claim that it belonged to either. Once again the spectra faded. The wind blew softly, leaves rustled and moved in the space where the shadow had been.

The car pulled into the school parking lot, and into the back to the sports fields. The school building was an older, red brick building. Large windows decorated the side of it, the insides were dark but on some you could see papers hung. Paintings done by small children hung to display their art work to the world. The shadow past in front of them, not even glancing at artwork, he remained in his world as much as possible, separating himself from all that was human. Fading into and out of this world he crept along side the building, keeping a close eye on the vehicle that now had come to a rest.

Car doors opened and four young girls came out, around college age.. Dressed as you'd expect a young girl in a society based on conformity would be, jeans and a t-shirt. One of the girls was wearing a tank top, despite it still being early spring and the night air far too chilly for such dress. The dashed into the field giggling wildly, running haphazardly, darting in and out of each others way.

The shadow had moved, quickly and silently to the opposite side of the field, he was watching the display, but his eyes were also searching in the darkness. Expecting to see something one moment that wasn't there the last.

The girls being tried from giggling and running collapsed in the middle of the field, the quited down, and started into the blank empty sky. What went thought their heads in that moment between being free and happy human beings to suddenly being faced with a large empty void could never be known, but the shadow that stood watching them believed that they couldn't understand such a concept, that no human being who hasn't tasted the darkness on his own tung could understand what it truly meant.

“August?” A sweet voice whispered softly. A slender form faded into reality, she was dressed in the same cloak as August. “You felt it also?”

He replied without looking at her. “I don't know how I could miss it.” He pointed to the group of girls, she stared at them as if just noticing them. Her facial expression changed from vacant to surprise instantly.

“What do you think it means?” Her voice was uneasy. “A summoner? Now? After all this time?”

August nodded, “Something was calling me here. That I am sure of. But don't be too nervous Neda , you never handled jealousy well.” He started to walk toward the middle of the field, he stayed in phase this time. She followed after him.

“Not now, August!” She scolded. “This is far more important!”

Augusts voice remained calm. “Nothing has happened yet. I don't think it'll be anything beyond what we can handle.” He stopped, still a good distance away from the girls. He could hear soft voices carried on the night. Again, he looked into the darkness, searching. His companion joined him searching in the opposite direction.

“I can sense something.” Neda said at length, “But whatever it is, it's hiding. Maybe we were too quick to judge. It could just be a beast.”

“No.” August was short. “No, I'm sure. Someone has lured me here. We weren't as careful as we had believed at the end of the war. They're were survivors. The other groups have encountered them. It seemed they were avoiding us, but now someone has the guts to challenge us.”

Silence only broken by the whispers of the young girls laying in the cool grass covered them. They listened to the wind, to the darkness. Any sign at all that could help them.

Again, Neda broke the silence. “I'll go and look in the surrounding area, there as to be some signs.” August nodded an agreement, Nada leapt into the air as she vanished into the black.

Several minutes passed with nothing. Suddenly he turned toward the woods, far past the laughing girls. “It's there” he whispered to himself.

August few forward, pushing himself with all the effort that he could muster, he hit the ground and began to run while drawing his sword. He swung in time to counter a black, beastly claw. He toppled the beast with another push, jumping into the air and onto it's powerful chest he stabbed though it's heart. The beast dissolved as he fell toward the ground. August landed softly and was immediately alert again. Staring deeper though the forest he could see eyes looking back at him.

“This isn't a random slip,” he mumbled to himself. “There is a summoner here.” Two arrows sped past his head shortly followed by two terrifying screams of pain. Two pairs of eyes vanished form the twilight. Neda landed next to him. She looked at him and nodded. They spit in opposite directions, he released a burst of energy from his blade as she fired more arrows into the black. They seemed oblivious to the horrible screams of the monsters as they departed this world.

“Up ahead!” August called out, “The rift!” They say it though the trees, a black hole where no light could reach, another beast emerged from the portal. With a great swing of his scimitar August dispatched it with ease. Neda jumped in front of the rift and became to draw a glyph in the air while chanted, the glyph appeared in brilliant light and floated backwards onto the rip in space. Setting itself on top both the glyph and the rip disappear slowly.

Neda let out a slow sigh and smiled. She turned to look at August, his face held in a grim mask. “See, it was just a rip. This wasn't caused my anyone.”

“It was a test.”

“You're paranoid, I'm heading back.” August watched Neda jump into the air and disappear into the night, he began to follow but stopped once the girls came into view and gazed longingly at them. He fought back a tear.

Neda materialized behind him, “I'm sorry she was here. I miss my family too, but we had the choice in the beginning and we decided to fight. We decided that the cause was greater then leaving our families behind. I don't know about you, but nothing has changed since then.”

August was still staring in the direction of the girls, gazing sheepishly into the clear night sky. “It's different from before. The war is over, there is nothing left but to clean up messes like this.”

Neda put her arms around his neck from behind. “I'm sorry.”

“I can't even show my own Sister that I'm here. Who ever called me here is going to pay, let's go back and contact the other bases.”

August faded out and Neda lost her balance and almost fell out of the sky, whispering “Bastard” to herself as she followed after.

They reached their home, and former base of operations for the area, during the resistance, and tossed aside their heavy cloak's. The place was an old rundown shop, boarded up on the outside and shut out from the light it has sat ignored by the developing city around it for twenty years. It was an ideal place to set up a place where they could hide from the enemy back during the way. Inside was dank and dusty, lacked color and light. But it was shelter and it was safe.

Being a hot evening and knowing how August felt Neda put on an outfit she knew August liked. Shorts and a tank top without a bra; and made sure August knew she wasn't wearing a bra but making it obvious while getting dressed. August just tossed on a t shirt and jeans and went right to the communicator, an old crystal orb which was connected to the other resistance bases around the world. The energy used to connect them could not be traced by the enemy because it originated in our universe. He didn't notice what she was wearing at all.

Neda sat pulled up a chair next to the table and bent low over the crystal, again attempting to be noticed and have August allow her to take his mind off his theory of being set up in the park. Nothing seemed like it would take him off his quest, however.

August touched the top of the sphere gently and the surface rippled slightly.

“Who are you going to contact?” Neda inquired.

“I'm sending out a general call information call.” A general information call is used to quickly ask all the bases if they had seen anything worth reporting recently. Normally this was used by the main base alone when there were hundreds of bases and getting reports to all of them whenever they asked out be impossible. But now only a little over a dozen are still operational and there is a The ripple made it's way to the bottom and disappeared, and then nothing. The ball seemed to return to it's normal state.

August sat back and slouched in his chair staring at the ball intently, Neda looked worried. She stood up and stretched expecting a reaction. But August just looked blankly into the ball. At that she gave up, “I'm going to read, if you need anything just call.”

August nodded and she began to walk into the “living room”, really just the room where they kept books, a small television, and a computer. As she walked past August she brushed her hand on his shoulder. “I'm sorry,” he mumbled. “I know you're trying to take my mind off of this but I have that feeling. I've never been wrong when I get his. I need to know, because whomever it is targeted me specifically. I appreciate what you're doing. I love you, don't forget that.”

Neda bent down and gave him a tight hug around his neck, her breast squashed into his face. She continued on her way, barely dodging August's hand trying to slap her ass.

August stared at the ball for another half an hour before being too tired to continue. He began to stand up, but was stopped suddenly as a short high pitched screech was emitted from the ball. He sat back down, eagerly awaiting the face to materialize in the glass. Neda came running in and took her seat.

Three male faces appeared in the crystal, they looked tied but beamed smiles though the smooth glass. “August!” The middle one proclaimed. “It's been a year since we've last spoken. I wish we could talk on happier terms.”

“Little joy remains in these times, Alexis. Seeing you alive is one of them. How are you?”

“It's been slow, not much but a stray beast here and there. Except for today.” He paused to read August's reaction. But August remained stone faced. “We encountered a summoner, and fought with him a good ten minutes before he escaped.”

“Could you grudge his rank?”

(This a more of a note, and will probably be omitted)

The strength and ability of a warrior is measured using a ranking system which goes from twenty; the weakest; to one. The majority of beasts fall under a twenty, and in order to be considered having any ability to manipulate the world between you must rank a twenty. Anything under that is normal human, or a light rise in a humans ability to see things that exist in the area between the two known universes. But nothing more. At twenty someone starts to gain the ability to manipulate the area between the two universes and travel back and forth between them with effort.

After rank 15 you are able to summon weapons, armor, and beasts to you. As well as travel freely between your home universe and the area in between Universes. At rank 10 the layers that make up the void become visible and can be moved though freely. This gives the illusion of a warrior disappearing or moving at incredible speeds; but they just move into a layer where the laws are different in order to get the desired result.

At Rank five a warrior can fuse the void with his own body, so that the void itself becomes energy and the physical endurance and stamina is what matters when it comes to how much of that energy can be drawn from the void. Also, all former ability improve with each level. A Rank five will be able to summon a stronger weapon or more powerful monsters to aid him then a level seven. A rank five also has the power to move between universes, although doing so will take most of his strength; they also retain some of the powers they draw from the void in the solid universes.

At level one can pass freely between universes and use all of his ability in a universe. He also can use his power to aid others though the void into the foreign universe. All other abilities are in top form making a rank 1 the all around supreme warrior.

Then there is the final rank, Rank 0 is the ultimate form, and it goes beyond all the others by it's definition. In order to achieve a Rank 0 a warrior must draw the void itself into their body, and in doing this gain the energy right from it. Also, using the voids shapeless and simple design the warrior is able to form the void into anything they want. Unlike the forming of a weapon by using the warriors own power, to shape the Void is to create living matter. A warrior can transform himself into anything he wants. A great beast or demon with unlimited strength, or a bird in order to gain a great advantage over your enemy. A weapon created from the Void is much stronger then any a warrior could summon on their own. The uses of taking the Void itself and manipulating it are as limitless as the users imagination.

“Some early readings set him at rank 14, Alexis looked nervous. But after a bit of fighting we sensed him as high as 6. By the skill at which he was able to fight us off he might cap out anywhere around 4 or above.”

August looked disgusted. “Yet, you allowed him to get away and didn't send out a general alarm?”

Alexis looked confused, taken a back. He was used to August being a bit temperamental but he couldn't understand his reasoning now. “August, we just got back and I answered your alert right away.”

August leaped to his feel and slammed both fists on the table. “That isn't possible! You are over 1500 miles from here, how could we have both encountered this rouge on the same night?”

Neda looked at August, worry in her eye. August knew what the obvious answer must be, but he had to hear it from someone else. Neda didn't want to say it aloud either, because it meant that the war must resume.

Finally Alexis spoke softly; “You know what this means, as well as all of us do.” August slowly took his seat again. “August, you are the strongest out of all the survivors so it's you get the option of taking the position of leader. I have faith that you will not fail, this won't be like last time. This time we have the upper hand, they are the ones who are hiding and attempting to attack in secret.”

August looked up at Neda, she nodded and smiled at him. Her confidence in him has never wavered. She knew she had to fight, and she would follow anyone who the group followed. But in her eyes August was the best choice, because he never departed from the side of him that was attached to the Earth. “Ok,” he said at length. “This time, we'll hunt down every last one of them. Beginning with the summoner who called me out tonight.”

“Called you out?” Alexis was confused.

“Sorry, we encountered a rift today. It was in my hometown, and my sister was nearby. That is why I sent out the general alarm. I believed it to be a summoner who knew about me.”

Alexis whispered something to the person next to him. “That does sound suspicious, you didn't see anyone though?”

“No, but I felt something briefly. Starting tomorrow we'll actively attempt to hunt him down. That is a standing order starting now, by the way. Hunt down and destroy all possible enemies. Vigilantly.”

Alexis suluted. “Yes sir, we will not allow him to escape next time.”

“I hope not. Since you are the senior member still with us I'll appoint you to my second in command. Make sure all the other cells get the message, and let's try and see if we can't get an estimate on the size of the survivors we are dealing with.”

“Understood, the current number of enemies stands at 2 confirmed and an unknown amount unconfirmed. We'll make finding out the size, location, and structure of the enemies a priority.”

“Agreed, that should be all for now. Good luck, Alexis. They don't stand a chance against us this time.”

“Good luck, August. No, they do not.”

The orb returned to it's clear state. August looked at Neda, she was smiling at him. “What are you smiling about?” He asked her kindly, “We're at war, you know.”

She let a small giggle escape. “I know, it's that you haven't had that much confidence in your words in a long time. It's good to see.”

August leaned across the table and kissed Neda deeply. “Let's go to bed, we have a long day tomorrow. We're going to find that bastard.”

[Chris]

A single car traveled along down the center street the headlights broke the darkness, only a few houses had lights on, they shined dimly upon the world at that hour, a great peace had settled on the earth as the sun retires for it's nightly rest. Humans who have settled into their safe homes where they can be protected from the darkness, inside their own private worlds.

I'll read the rest tomarrow, as I'm exhausted right now, but dude. The grammer is ALLLL over the place, and it's a bit difficult to read. Your concept pretty cool though.

[Bundydoc]

Wow, great story. Very interesting. I am a little confused about the different universes and who is where, etc. But understanding it will come with more of the story I can tell. There weren't a lot of issues I found with the writing style except for the grammer. A few places where you would use the same word in the same or back to back sentences, but editing with find these. Try reading your story aloud - you'll find all sorts of little things you never noticed before.

I would love to read more of this if you have it.

[Gundampilotspaz]

I'll read the rest tomarrow, as I'm exhausted right now, but dude. The grammer is ALLLL over the place, and it's a bit difficult to read. Your concept pretty cool though.

Yup, that's a problem because I'm lazy

But really, when I first write I worry about getting idea onto the page. Smoothing it out comes afterwards.

Wow, great story. Very interesting. I am a little confused about the different universes and who is where, etc. But understanding it will come with more of the story I can tell. There weren't a lot of issues I found with the writing style except for the grammer. A few places where you would use the same word in the same or back to back sentences, but editing with find these. Try reading your story aloud - you'll find all sorts of little things you never noticed before.

I would love to read more of this if you have it.

Again, yeah serious editing has to happen on all of my work. Because of the way I work and I've never been too careful with grammar affects this. Editing is very key

I'm working on more now, which is really odd considering this is the story that comes after the main story is all over and done with. So we'll see exactly how far I'm going.

Right now I'm working on a scene introducing the villains which is harder because the reader doesn't know who survived after the war. Where they know exactly who survived when it comes to the heroes.

So that is going to take awhile ^^;;

[Battle_Pope]

interesting concept

[Ceraziefish]

Huh... I want to see it developed more. I'm interested in the war.

Why does August say that Alexis is the most powerful and should be in charge, and then start giving orders? Maybe I missed something.