darkon Posted January 3, 2006 Share Posted January 3, 2006 Yeah, over the past few weeks a girl and I have been talking, I mean really talking. According to one of her friends, if I asked her out I'd be happy with the results. So, finally, I decided to do it on Friday. I got one of those cool "I don't know" answers that more or less means "No, but I don't want to hurt your feelings." However, I now think it really was an "I don't know" and it took her awhile to think about it. So, a little while ago we finally talked about it and... well read RT to see exactly how hard it hit me. Me: Fun... anyway... I'm not going to beat around the bush. I think we should talk about Friday. Her: what bout it Me: Well, I didn't really get across what I wanted to say... because I suck and was nervous. Her: k Me: Okay, first off, I took "I don't know" as a resounding "no". And secondly, AIM isn't my first choice of a place to talk about this... but you make do with what you have. Me: But, essentially, a few weeks ago (not even going to try to identify when, but after MooCho closed) I started thinking about you alot, I enjoyed talking to you and hanging out with you. Me: And we spent more time together and talked more, and I decided that I had to tell you when I finally got the nerves up to do it. I remember you, coincidentally, told me once "when you like a girl, tell her, chances are she'll like you back." So I finally decided on Friday I'd tell you. Me: And I did it a random time, and I stuttered, and looked like a clown. But that's what I wanted to tell you... and that's that. I don't know how you feel (to be honest, I thought you liked me back), but I'm here if feel the same way. Me: And if you don't, I think we make great friends anyway... but I think we could be something more than friends. Her: well uh i like u a lot as a friend and i like to talk to you online and what not but i think tha when we are like in person its def weird and i dont feel very comfortable just me and u i dunno why but i dunno but it bother me that does cause we can talk bout anything online but then in person we dont i dunno but i dunno i like us just bein friends Me: Well, I noticed that it was kind of weird when we're together. But part of it is that I'm afraid of other people hearing what I say. I mean, if it's just you and me, alone, it'll be like talking online. Her: well i still think its diff and i dunno. Me: Well, I'm not going to try to convince you. But, I can really work on it not being different. I have a level of discomfort, especially around my parents, where I don't open up to people. I'm always paranoid they are listening to me, but that's besides the point I guess. And I think part of the reason it's different is because, lately at least, I've been really nervous when I'm around you. And, that makes me look like a pussy I know, but that's how it is. Her: well i can see that but ya kno.. Me: Well, I guess that's it then... I don't really have anything else to say. And I gather you don't really want to hang out with me unless other people are around? Her: well it wouldnt be weird then Me: But, what exactly makes it weird... this is something which, honestly, doesn't make sense to me. And it kind of hurts me... Her: i dunno why it is weird it just is Me: Fair enough I guess... since I don't feel the same way I suppose I can't really relate. And I guess you don't really know what makes it feel weird? Her: i just said i dunno Me: Yeah, that was a redundant question. It's just so confusing to me and I won't understand I suppose. Her is away at 8:15:56 PM. I obviously changed the screenames to protect the innocent. But how do I react to that? It's like being told I have two personalities and the real personality sucks as far as I take it. I mean, I don't get how she can just say "it's weird" without even elaborating on it. But, she did, and I have to deal with it. Then she just left without even saying she was, before I could even finish talking. And it hurts and everything... but what am I to do? I shouldn't have done this on AIM, I know. It's easier for her to say what she said on AIM... I'm hoping to talk to her again but I also hope that talking to her about this again doesn't make me sound like a freak. So, my whole confidence and self-esteem has more or less been shot in one fell swoop. Link to comment
Anime Gee Posted January 3, 2006 Share Posted January 3, 2006 Do not worry young man. It seems like this girl is uncertain about herself & what she wants. There will be many other girls along the way. I've been rejected a few times too, & yeah, kinda feels fucked up, but then you go, "Oh well. Her loss." And you move on! Remember this. Not everyone will get along with you. Somtimes there will be compatability issues. Not that the other person hates you or anything, but it's just not there & you really can't do much about it. But yeah. Don't let it get to you. (^o^ ) <3 Link to comment
darkon Posted January 3, 2006 Author Share Posted January 3, 2006 Gee, the real problem is simply that I want to go back to before I asked her out now and judging by the way she's acted SINCE I asked her that's impossible. Link to comment
Anime Gee Posted January 3, 2006 Share Posted January 3, 2006 Gee, the real problem is simply that I want to go back to before I asked her out now and judging by the way she's acted SINCE I asked her that's impossible. Don't sweat it man. Just give it some time. Later on, ask when you think it's appropriate, but try to do it in person. (^_^ ) Link to comment
darkon Posted January 3, 2006 Author Share Posted January 3, 2006 Don't sweat it man. Just give it some time. Later on, ask when you think it's appropriate, but try to do it in person. (^_^ ) I asked her in person, and then decided to talk to her about it on AIM since she seemed not wanting to talk about it on Friday. I'm just in the middle of a self-esteem crisis since I don't know how I can possibly react to her not wanting to see me unless she is with other people. I can't really talk to her in person thanks to that. It sucks man, and I'm not really able to handle it well right now. Link to comment
Tanni Foemangler Posted January 3, 2006 Share Posted January 3, 2006 forget about it man, there are plenty of fish in the sea. best thing to do is move on to bigger and better things, to paraphrase the wandering gee and not to be a dick or anything, but i think you'd be better off with someone grammatically on par with yourself Link to comment
Anime Gee Posted January 3, 2006 Share Posted January 3, 2006 All I can say is that you tried your best & she didn't take it. Her loss. I know that all this is fresh in our mind right now, but try not to think about it too much. It will get you worse. Just be like me, "Oh well! zOMG! That chick over there is HAWT! *Runs to talk to her.*" (^_~ ) Trust me. You'll be over this girl before you know it. After living on this planet for 30 years & dealing with the girlies since I was about 12, I can honestly tell you that you're going to look back on this & say, "Man! What the hell was I thinking! That chick sucked!" (^o^ ) Trust me. There will be PLENTY of other women. Try not to get worked up. ( ^_^) Link to comment
margot Posted January 3, 2006 Share Posted January 3, 2006 Yea, there are tons of other girls, and no offense but she seems like an idiot. Link to comment
Gundampilotspaz Posted January 3, 2006 Share Posted January 3, 2006 Yea, there are tons of other girls, and no offense but she seems like an idiot. *nods* Link to comment
Belial Posted January 3, 2006 Share Posted January 3, 2006 A lot of people seem dumb online, I've decided if the camera adds 10 lbs. the internet steals at least 20 IQ points. As for advice, I really can't give any, since all the girls I've asked out have said "Yes". But seriously man, you're in High School, now is not the time to fret over one girl, there will be many more to come and each one will break your heart. But, despite this, you'll keep going forward, and hopefully, before you die, you'll find one that's worth worrying about. Link to comment
Samurai Drifter Posted January 3, 2006 Share Posted January 3, 2006 (edited) Yea, there are tons of other girls, and no offense but she seems like an idiot. *agrees* Even if you did get to go out with her it wouldn't end well. A lot of people seem dumb online, I've decided if the camera adds 10 lbs. the internet steals at least 20 IQ points. So true... Edited January 3, 2006 by Samurai Drifter Link to comment
Arcane Posted January 3, 2006 Share Posted January 3, 2006 A lot of people seem dumb online, I've decided if the camera adds 10 lbs. the internet steals at least 20 IQ points. Yeah, just look at WoW. There can't possibly be that many retards in the world. At least half of the WoW population is the stupidest person I've ever talked to. Link to comment
Kreutz Posted January 3, 2006 Share Posted January 3, 2006 She's wishy-washy and avoids conflict with ignorance. You can do so much better. Link to comment
Venom112 Posted January 3, 2006 Share Posted January 3, 2006 She's wishy-washy and avoids conflict with ignorance. You can do so much better. Not to mention she's so vain I bet she thinks that one song is about her... About her, about her. Link to comment
Gundampilotspaz Posted January 4, 2006 Share Posted January 4, 2006 well uh i like u a lot as a friend and i like to talk to you online and what not but i think tha when we are like in person its def weird and i dont feel very comfortable just me and u i dunno why but i dunno but it bother me that does cause we can talk bout anything online but then in person we dont i dunno but i dunno i like us just bein friends I thought MY grammar and spelling on AIM was poor. Link to comment
Alundra Posted January 4, 2006 Share Posted January 4, 2006 First off, this chick is obviously not into you for a variey of reasons: - Assuming that this AIM conversation is copy and pasted, you almost smother her with intelligent conversation. From the looks of it, she seems like little more than someone looking for someone to talk to when they are bored. - As for your real-life encounters with this girl, you were never really friends. If you can't hang out with someone one-on-one, then they aren't really your friend; best you can make with that situation is to introduce the "friends with benefits" aspect. - She seems like a fucking tard, dude. No fleshed out responses, and the wishy-washy behavior shows some lack of stability on either her mental, or emotional states of mind. I fear the former is apparent. Get off the computer and forge real relationships with chicks, the difference between AIM and real life is that you can make an excuse to leave if the coversation is dying online. Chemisty is something that is a myth online, you don't really know a person until you meet them in real life; never give into any emotion over the internet, you will regret it. Which I assume you are right now. Link to comment
John Posted January 4, 2006 Share Posted January 4, 2006 Um...I'm pretty sure he knows this girl in real life. Or am I just reading what you wrote in a totally wrong way? Link to comment
Venom112 Posted January 4, 2006 Share Posted January 4, 2006 Um...I'm pretty sure he knows this girl in real life. Or am I just reading what you wrote in a totally wrong way? What Alundra actually meant is, "Dames is no good, betta off witout 'em. *puff cigar*" It's the temporary woman-hate from having walked into one of the many bars in the world and running into his old love that broke his heart years ago. This left him bitter. Sadly he met her online, and the forged a relationship in physicalities, but she ended up breaking his heart. Thus why he says the things he does. Don't read too much into it, just a moment of bitterness from ol' Alundra. Link to comment
darkon Posted January 4, 2006 Author Share Posted January 4, 2006 Um...I'm pretty sure he knows this girl in real life. Or am I just reading what you wrote in a totally wrong way? We worked together for almost a year and saw each other a lot. But didn't really start "hanging out" as they say until recently. Link to comment
Venom112 Posted January 4, 2006 Share Posted January 4, 2006 If a girl started saying "Oh, I'm sorry, I'm just too nervous and paranoid all the time" would you find it an attractive attirbute? Sure, why not? It's a display of shyness, and shyness can be considered cute, and wallah! Attractive quality formed! Link to comment
Alundra Posted January 4, 2006 Share Posted January 4, 2006 Sure, why not? It's a display of shyness, and shyness can be considered cute, and wallah! Attractive quality formed! I've always hated shy girls, it makes it too easy to push yourself on her and get her to do what you want to do. I like a challenge. Link to comment
darkon Posted January 4, 2006 Author Share Posted January 4, 2006 (edited) Well, it's not like I was shy to her at all, or have been. I simply told her it took me a little while to ask her. She's told me similar things before, it's not like we just started talking. We've been great, great friends for a long time and we both looked ready to take that next step. And then she got all indecisive at the last moment. And, also, I talked to another close friend about this and she said it's probably best if I give her some space for a few days and if she doesn't try to talk to me on Thursday or Friday, I should then try to talk to her again but keep it casual. Edited January 4, 2006 by Marcus Aurelius Link to comment
Kreutz Posted January 4, 2006 Share Posted January 4, 2006 And, also, I talked to another close friend about this and she said it's probably best if I give her some space for a few days and if she doesn't try to talk to me on Thursday or Friday, I should then try to talk to her again but keep it casual. Excuse me for being a bit rude, because I know you like her and all, but fuck her and her fucking schedule. If she's like this in courtship, just imagine how she'll be if you end up with her. Do what you want, though. What do I know? Link to comment
darkon Posted January 4, 2006 Author Share Posted January 4, 2006 Excuse me for being a bit rude, because I know you like her and all, but fuck her and her fucking schedule. If she's like this in courtship, just imagine how she'll be if you end up with her. Do what you want, though. What do I know? Well, the girl I talked to does not know her. My one friend does not know the girl I like so she was basing it from a fairly, "What most girls would like" standpoint. I'm honestly beginning to think that she just wants to get away from everything for a little while because in some way she feels just as bad as I feel. In which case, that's good I guess. I don't know, I'll have to talk to her again sometime... but I hope she's the one that tries to talk to me and not vice versa. Link to comment
Ceraziefish Posted January 5, 2006 Share Posted January 5, 2006 In my long life of having a lot of crushes, I have decided it is best to ignore such petty urges. Relationships are a meat thing, anyway. Link to comment
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